This year has been one of several disappointments. Some are my own doing; choices made that did not reap the intended results. I took time off from blogging to study for a certification that, in the end, I decided not to pursue. Then I lost my groove to write. Rarely one to take a vacation, I planned two this year, and they were both disappointing.
Also, I have come to the conclusion that people are generally disappointing. It’s naive of me to think that people will not change. After all, I change all the time. In fact, change is part of my tagline for this blog. So I should not be surprised. Yet it does; catch me by surprise that is, when people I feel close to reveal a level of insensitivity not seen before. It makes me question my own expectations though I don’t think they are very high.
I expect that someone who always had my back always will and that someone would hold back on the brutal part of brutal honesty. I expect family to show kindness and friends to go the extra mile. When someone remarks on my being thin, I expect it to come across as a compliment, not an insult. At work, I expect email responses within a reasonable time. At home, I expect fast service from my oil company when the heat is not working. I expect RSVPs to invitations and a commitment to plans made. I expect that clients who tell me they are sending me writing orders will actually send them.
I don’t expect my insurance rates to increase when I have a clean history of no claims. When I host a party, I don’t expect people to get offended when I decline a guest’s offer to wash my dishes. When I dine with friends, I don’t expect them to go into a rage if I’d prefer not to share my dish. If morning coffee addicts are cranky, I don’t expect them to take it out on me. If I display planning and organizational behaviors, I don’t expect to be labeled as a control freak. I don’t expect people to tell me what they wish I had done or not done when I can’t change the past. I don’t expect a sharp retort in response to an offer to help.
I guess my first resolution for the new year will be to banish all expectations of other people. I always set the bar too high for myself though, so I will likely to continue to disappoint me. Not much I can do about that.